Elvis- Love Me Tender

He’s even got the sideburns and everything!
I try to remind myself he isn’t the real thing…like for example, he wears underwear, for one. And he thinks he has a servant that he orders around all the time, just like real rock stars do…yet, then the image of him stroking that pic comes to mind and well, I’m smitten!
Should I tell my friend when we meet tonight, after she slips something in his tea to come out and meet me by the bushes behind the shed, as always, so we can paint the town red and go bar hopping…or should I just keep quiet about it?
Also, do you think she’ll be mad? We kind of have this ‘thing’ going…so do you think she’ll mind us sharing her Elvis impersonator?
No you aren’t…but those sideburns…*swoons*

Percy darlinK! Uh, hello! Erm…What are you doing here? Don’t worry about anything…Elvis has left the building, ok hun? *cough*

Well, this is another one of those tough moral dilemmas, now isn’t it? On the one hand, if you and your friend just go off gallivanting around behind this impersonators back, well then you might be asking for trouble. But, if this impersonator is half the Elvis he claims to be, then he shouldn’t mind the two of you going off and having a little fun time.

Now, I can’t tell you how to live your life, so you’ll have to put some deep thought into this, and get right to the heart of why his particular pic stroking gets you so smitten. There could be underlying issues that need to be addressed. Remember always, that there were, and are, other pic strokers out there. For example, Jerry Garcia, Bob Dylan, and Willie Nelson, to name a few.

Now, obviously, slipping something into this man’s tea is a right no-no. And whatever it was, let’s just hope it doesn’t cause any problems with his colon. The fact that you feel you have to resort to such measures could be an indicator that your friends Elvis impersonator might be a little too old for you, and the crowds you frequent. My suggestion is to give him a peanut butter and banana sandwich instead.

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